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The guilty hypocrite

When I renamed my blog , I promised myself that I would write only about topics which absolutely gripped me and mattered to me. Filling space is easy. But filling space is why I write exams. I want my words to matter here. It is not my intention to not write in this pretty blog but college life , examinations , holidays - basically life makes it tough to stay true to your other commitments.
And with that assurance of my bona fide intentions,  I begin with this post.

What do you do
When you wake up one day
And find out that
your entire life was a lie?
Not in a Paranoid Schizophrenia way
Oh no sir!
Something which is more subtle yet
equally life altering.

Every positive thought
Every negative one,
Which you may or may have not
admitted to yourself ,
About yourself -
Turns out to be

What do you do
When you wake up one day
And find out that
You are your worst nightmare?

You are everything
You asked others not to be .
In short . you never practised
but  screeched what you preached!

Do you let your new found hypocrisy
eat you up alive?
throw up all over the place?

Do you change your morals or your actions?
Or do you wait for this overwhelming wave
of hypocritical disgust which has hit you
to recede back with time
so that you continue to be yourself?

Hope that time will make you
forget this discomfiting discovery ,
so that you can 'move on'
with your self concept intact.

Answer me pliss ya .

- Semi 


  1. Parvathy TharamelMay 7, 2015 at 11:58 PM

    That's one of my worst fears! To wake up one day and realize that I'm acting in contradiction to my belief!!! However, at the end of the day I'm responsible for my actions. And I wouldn't have acted upon it until I had a slight feeling that's what I believe. In any which way, I personally feel realization is a good thing and it lays the foundation for improvement. After all there's scope for improvement everywhere! So I'll be happy that i realised before its too late and will work to practice what I preach!

    Thanks for the question Samyukta! Keep up the good work :)

  2. I'm currently stuck in the last part of your post, that of trying to " move on" with my self concept intact. Hope it works. Nevertheless, dissonance is always good and no one ever grew from being at ease with one's self. Hypocracy hopefully makes you loathe yourself and that should be motivation enough to be who you think you are.
    Really liked the way you put your thoughts out in this and the prose-poetry style of writing it.

  3. You're right.
    Especially what you said in the beginning. It's not about filling space. This was short but it was also very eye opening and frank.
    Very nice! :)

  4. That day hasnt come yet...
    But it definetly will...
    and when it does
    i will call u


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ek gaon mein ek kisan raghu thatha! :P

It's been a week in Pune already!! :O
and believe it or not  - I have fallen in love with this city! <3
or maybe it is just another one of my defense mechanisms , protecting me from shocks. Whatever this is , it has aroused me enough, to write a post! So let me finish this before reality sinks in .
( Side note :

  Defense mechanisms are pretty intriguing . Do you know that I haven't cried a single tear drop yet? My friends think it is some kind of sacrilegious blasphemy from my  part. But hey! If pessimists argue that I have effectively ended one life , I argue back that I have just started a new one :) I do miss chennai . However , I am not going to go gaga over it. Okay I just did . )
I haven't had much chance to discover the city in its entirety yet. But , from whatever I have seen - it is fresh , green , pleasant and mindnumbingly beautiful :')

So here it is . The elusive list of things I have noticed about Pune and my new life in general :

1) I was never a nat…

Mayil will not be quiet!

Just a line - Mayil Should Not Be quiet!
Once upon a time , 1 year ago a girl called Mayil Ganesan got an amateurish diary and lucky us got a chance to peek inside it!!

Are you the cases who read TOO much of serious/violent and heavy books and want to have a light break? Are you a pre teen / teen / just above teen  or a human being who wants fun? Read ' Mayil will not be quiet' a contemporary , funny bookiary from Niveditha Subramaniam and Sowmya Rajendran!
If you are thinking what happened to Semi, talking about girly pinky books!
Point no. 1 Girls that too teenage girls have a very complicated heads which I feel is way more interesting than male heads!
Point no.2 The Book is not pinky , it is blue.....PEACOCK BLUE, I would have to say that the cover is funky and gethu!

Moving on to the story , the protagonist is Mayil a to be 13 teen girl , who faces all the problems she has to face in this age! There is Thamarai , her brother , who 'seems' adorable ( brothers always s…

Friendship Matters

Someone to live for, care for , to create words for ( like goyakamoya)  , write a blog for and wait for – ever. Someone to beat , meddle , abuse , fight and love , care , occasionally hug , use magic words on  because you can DO it . Unveiling something that is always there and laid bare open – Friendship and introducing the homo sapien who can bear it – the FRIEND!

I don’t want be funny because I always am ; I want to grow tall because I am so short ; I want some alone time because I am so full of friends! All these three hypothesis have been researched on =P and have proved to have turned into disasters! Sometimes controlling nature is just not possible.....I am destined to be tormented by all the love from these lovely creatures! OK start hating me now , but I have research and scientific data to prove that you will patch up within  3 days because :
*I am soo funny * I am semi *I have the goofy face to melt your heart
So yeah , I push it to my limits to offend you guys! Yet I am …